I hate fantasy fiction SO VERY MUCH that on Saturday, due to an alert from LA-ist, I abandoned work, slathered Nair on these neglected armpits, jumped in the shower, tore apart my closet and accessories in search of just the right outfit for the Iron Throne (while quoting random passages from the books in my head), then got on a bus for a 45-minute ride followed by a 1/2 mile walk down Hollywood Boulevard carrying my assagai, JUST SO I COULD SIT IN THE THRONE OF THE SEVEN KINGDOMS.
And I signed away all rights to the below for use by someone else's marketing campaign because THAT'S HOW MUCH I ABSOLUTELY DESPISE FANTASY FICTION.
Fuck you, NYT. Thank you, GRRM. By the way, sir, I'm still Pissed Off On Your Behalf over the whole "Doorways" "Sliders" thing, even though you probably don't care anymore and it's not like you'll ever see this post but I just wanted to say. (A GRRM New Yorker profile. A GRRM tribute song answering the whiners amongst us.)
And by the way? I look damned good in these shots, if I do say so my own goddamned self. HBO had better use at least one of them, dammit! (Click to embiggen.)
Shout Out to the worker bees handling this Iron Throne's visit to Hollywood & Highland, who were so nice and did not freak out when I revealed that I was carrying live steel. One guy took shots with my camera, and the guy running the Official Camera is the one who said DON'T MOVE after the first shot, and then posed me for the other two shots. Thank you, fellow worker bees! I don't know if you are Mundane or Of The Tribe, but by your actions I know that you were quick-off-the-mark enough to recognize that a Geek Tribe member had shown up in the line, and you rolled with it in an Awesome way. Thank you.
For the record, I had a cover on my assagai, because you don't walk around in public with live steel that could actually hurt someone and/or alarm law enforcement.
And my LOATHING of fantasy fiction is so very complete that the ring on my finger is a Miskatonic University class ring, which I wear every day BECAUSE I HATE IT ALL SO MUCH.
And and AND the scuffed boots? Scuffed partially from GENERAL DAILY ASS KICKING, but mostly from fleeing invisible giant robots in downtown Los Angeles a couple of years ago.
Silly me. I forgot to point out that my feeling of DESPICABLE FOR ALL THINGS FANTASY OR GENRE HAS LASTED MY ENTIRE LIFE.
