More From The Annals Of We Can't Take You ANYWHERE, Can We?
(Latest in an occasional series.)
So there I am at a thing, this time charged with engaging as many of the several tens of tens of tens of thousands of Avoiding Eye Contact people walking past.
BGF: May I gift you*** with our newsletter?
Target: No thanks.
BGF: May I gift you with our newsletter?
Target: You people are why this country is going down the drain.
BGF: May I gift you with our newsletter?
Target: Sure!
BGF: Our newsletter! Let me show you it!
Target: Thanks.
BGF: May I gift you with our newsletter?
Target: No.
BGF: May I gift you with our newsletter?
Target: Where did you get that bag?
BGF: If I tell you, will you promise to let me gift you with our newsletter?
Same Target: Sure.
BGF: You have to take the newsletter, first.
Same Target: Hahaha!
BGF: No, seriously. TAKE THE NEWSLETTER.
Same Target: <can't stop laughing as he takes the newsletter, nor as I direct him to turn around, look at the giant C-SPAN bus right behind him, walk over to it and take one of the bags from the giant pile of bags on their table. and then he starts laughing harder. i can understand why it was kinda funny, but i don't get why it was that funny.>
BGF: May I gift you with - O MY GOD!
Gustavo: <raises eyebrows in slight alarm>
BGF: You're the guy! That Mexican! That's you! Gustavo, ah..
Gustavo: ... Arellano.
BGF: I love your column! You're doing the Lord's work! I have your book!
Gustavo: Hey, thanks! <eyebrows lower into non-alarm mode>
BGF: And I totally knew the April 1st column was a joke!
Gustavo: That makes you the third person in the city who got it.
BGF: Can I take a picture of you?
Gustavo: Sure -
BGF: NO! Wait! COWORKER! TAKE A PICTURE OF US!!
Coworker: ... Okay.
BGF: So...may I gift you with our newsletter?
Gustavo: <laughs> Please, do.
For non-locals, a couple of random examples of his work.
After my shift I wandered a bit and snagged three more entries for the hobby site, then went home and fell over. I'd been up really, really later than I should have.
