And We Shall March

Idiot Girl Strikes Again

For the record, I do know the difference between "principle" and "principal," okay? It was 11 at night! There was plum wine involved!

*slaps forehead, which is easy, due to it being so big*

The Answer To The Question

Okay, after 27 responses I don't need to wait for the remaining 43 to come in to guess that chances are none of you are going to figure it out.

This was the line: "It Is A Day So Long In Coming That I Am Uncertain How To Celebrate It."

This is the source: Transformers! From back in the day, during our era. It was the series that took place right after the movie, when Rodimus had taken over the Prime spot. I forget the series name, though. I mostly just remember that quote.

The character who said it: One of the Quintessans, the aliens who created the Transformer race.

Just so you know, don't be surprised if the HGIC (Head Geek In Charge) contacts you soon to discuss terms of the revocation of your membership.

xo

Transformers Movie: Optimus Is WEEPING

But he's doing so in a stoic, robot sort of way, of course...

Optimus is weeping because the thought hit us here at BGF Central that what we Need is one of those countdown clocks that we can put on the siderail of the blog. They've got one up at the official movie site , but you can't download it and we have no idea how it was created. We have spent a little bit of time trolling the internet(s) for template countdown clocks we can adapt, but they are either ugly, or confusing, or huge, or all three. All of them require tech skills we do not posses. Alas, there is no adaptable countdown clock available in the current gallery of Typepad widgets.

And so Optimus weeps. Will no one help the widow's son?

Somebody needs to step up and create a blog-friendly Transformers movie countdown clock. We are kinda surprised that such a thing is not already offered in the download area of the official movie site. We want it to have either an autobot logo or the mechanical eyeball menancing over Earth graphic that's used at the official movie site. It would be nice if it could also have the words "A Michael Bay Experience" included somewhere.*** Though we know that the target opening date is July 4, 2007, we also know that it's not uncommon for the Hollywood People to move opening dates. So if this countdown clock had "7.4.07" on it, there would need to be a way to change that date down the road if something happens.

Meanwhile, we are ASTOUNDED by the number and variety of Closet Transformers Fans among our circle of friends and aquaintances who have Revealed themselves to us over these weeks. We had no idea these people, some of whom we have known for YEARS, also kept a secret love for the Transformers tucked away in their hearts. Some of them are, like us, are GIRLS. Ladies, did you know about the Transformers movie plushie? Now you do! I can't wait to see what this doll actually is. Perhaps our Dread Cthulu Pin Cushion will have a new friend come summer. We don't know about you, but now we DESPERATELY want a Megatron plushie...

Wouldn't it be cool if the plushie turned out to be Beta, Elita One or Arcee? Yeah, realistically speaking they won't be because there's nothing in the leaks on the internet(s) hinting that any of the female Transformers make an appearance in this movie, but one can dream.

Anywho, we should out you guys to each other and see what happens. (Don't worry. We won't. We'll just file away this info in case it becomes a handy and profitable data bit to sell to the tabloids one day. *evil cackle*)

Meanwhile, I'm not nearly caught up to where I need to be. Posting will probably continue to be light through next week.

*** This is the man who gave us an asteroid chase scene. He doesn't do Movies. He does Experiences.

Transformers Movie: I Was A Fleeing Extra!!!!

Yup, that's what this post was hinting at, and also this one. This weekend I had one of the best experiences I've ever had in my life. It was as if Me and the 13-year-old boy who is my inner essence merged into  one quivering mass of Can You Believe We're HERE And We're Doing THIS???

I was a fleeing, screaming extra! And a crouching extra! And a sprinting at top speed flailing my arms extra! And a crawling through debris and dirt extra! All in high heels!

IT WAS EVERYTHING I HAD DREAMED IT WOULD BE! Except for I had no idea the food would be so tasty.

I got to watch one of the King Of Movies Where Hard-Bodied Men Blow Shit Up at work. Just that part was incredibly fascinating. I got picked by him to crouch behind something and scream, and picked by one of the assistant directors to crouch behind something else and scream, and I volunteered to scream and crawl. Besides that, I joined my brethren in "background" in general running and screaming and running and screaming only different this time and putting in the earplugs and running and screaming over there and pausing to eat ooo boy so very tasty food before returning to running and screaming for a few more hours.

I got specifically yelled at only once by one of the people in charge. It was for applauding at a truly wonderful and artful explosion, unaware that somewhere 1,000 feet down the street and around a corner was a camera that could see me. Oops. Happily, this One Of The Guys In Charge*** didn't say the dread words GET OFF MY SET, so all was well.

I'm NOT going to tell you what scene we filmed over those two days, but OMFG it is AWESOME. I'm also not going to tell you about the Transformers who appear in this movie that you haven't heard anything about yet. I think it's safe to say that Explosive Devices were put to much use, and gloriously so.

Trying to think what insider thing can I share that would be interesting, but not spoilery? Got it! Optimus has his own spritzer bottle and soft cloth. True! I saw these items with my own eyes. I thought about using them after I hugged Optimus and kissed his left fender, but decided not to.

Do I care that I had to get up at 4:30 in the morning to be there in time, and that I had to wear the same clothes for two days, and that these clothes now smell like gunpowder, skid row grit and whatever the hell was in that foul smoke machine, or that my favorite black boots got seriously banged up?  I DO NOT.

I WAS AN EXTRA IN THE TRANSFORMERS MOVIE! MY DESTINY HAS BEEN FULFILLED! You know, I never expected this to have a happy ending.

After weeks of trying and failing, how did I manage to get assigned to be an extra on this very last weekend of shooting in LA? Simple! I didn't. Neil did. And he graciously declined my offer of turning over my soul in exchange. He was also kind enough not to say idiot, why weren't you paying attention? My excuse is I don't pay attention to all of the Hollywood People details, just some of them.

When I asked if I could tell everybody how this came to be, Neil said it was okay provided I share these words of his very own: "I'm happy for you to say it was me, on the basis that it's not exactly a repeatable phenomenon. It's not like I could get you, or anyone else, into any other film...

Got it? Please do not flood the man with requests to hook you up with a movie thing. This was a lucky, one shot, the stars were in alignment with Optimus sort of thing. Thank you thank you thank you thank you, O Neil. (Shout also to the friends, and friends of  friends, who also stepped up to help.)

While I can't talk about what we did in the movie, I can talk about some of the people I met doing the movie. I'll probably do that down the road. Eragon fans? OMIG wait until you hear whom I was running and screaming with.

Posting will be a little light this week. I've got to catch up on lots of stuff.

*** There were so many people ordering us around I never could get a handle on who did what, exactly. If I had been able to spend more time watching the set work I'd have figured it out. There was always a pack of people around Bay, but there were four of them whose job seemed to be to directly execute his will. Of those, there were two who read as Alphas over absolutely everybody else on the staff. This guy was one of them. Remember Cool Hand Luke and the man with no eyes? One of the things that made him effective was how you could *never* tell who he was looking at at any given moment. This guy was like that. He also had the ability to just appear out of thin air. If I were in charge of the world, I'd have these two (and maybe one other guy a few rungs below them on thes set) come to a couple of groups I'm involved with to run How To Get People To OBEY workshops.

Also Known As The Zulu Dance Of Victory

Meanwhile, clicky to make your own library card!

(I used the Dewey system rather than the LoC system for the above, mainly due to familiarity. I think you can make one with LoC, though. Try it and see!)

Deep In The Bowels Of BGF Central Right At This Moment Of Crisis

Two Hours Ago, At BGF Central ...

BGF: Get over here NOW. You have to HELP ME.
Ms. Classy:  What did they say?
BGF:  <redacted>
Classy: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
BGF: Fuck you! HELP ME. I don't have any taste!!! YOU HAVE TO COME OVER HERE AND HELP ME.

Update! (10 months later, now that I can talk about it): This post relates to being an extra on the Transformers movie. I had to call in the night before the shoot and listen to a recording that provided bunches of details we needed to know, including what to wear. Extras often wear their own clothing. The recording said that women were to be dressed "upscale casual," as if on a fancy date or summer dressy. There was also a rundown for how your hair and makeup was to be done. I panicked. I don't even know what "upscale casual" means. So I reached out to a friend who could help.  For  one thing her men, unlike mine, wear suits. She would know what to wear for an upscale casual fancy date.

Right Now, At BGF Central, Amid A Closet Explosion Trailing Through Several Rooms...

Classy: One tube of lipstick? In the entire house?
BGF: It's the same kind Eddie Izzard uses.
Classy: ONE tube?
BGF: What? It was like, $20!
Classy: You have one tube of lipstick and five lint brushes.
BGF: You've met the cat.
Classy: I'll give you that. So you have one tube of lipstick and 19 boxes of comic books.
BGF: Don't you judge me!! What about these shoes?
Classy: Nice. But can you run for you life in them?
BGF: Shit!
Classy: Those are your CFM pumps, aren't they?
BGF: And honey, they work.
<Phone rings. Conversation redacted.>
BGF: She said bring more than one outfit just in case.
Classy: She can tell over the phone that you're tacky?
BGF: Fuck you! Put down that Reisling AND HELP ME.
Classy: Calm down. Your wardrobe isn't as bad as you think it is.
BGF: My stomach hurts. DAMMIT. I forgot to shave my head! I have to shave my head!
Classy: That's probably a good idea.
BGF: ...
Classy: Problem?
BGF: I should blog this for posterity.
Classy: You are the  second most pathetic person I know.
BGF: Which ex is the first?
Classy: <redacted>
BGF: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Classy: Throw on some Nair while you're typing.
BGF: I thought Eurotrash underarms were hip?
Classy: My dear Lord Jesus, give me strength...

Graphic Novel Goodness: One Down, Four To Go

Because my habit is to rarely talk about works in progress, most visitors to BGF Central don't know that over the past 4 years I have completed scripts to five (and 3/4ths) graphic novels. ***

• First one is buried deep in a box in the garage where no one will ever see it.  I should find it, chop it into bits, jump on it and set it aflame just to make sure it can't get out and hurt anyone. It was my I Wonder How You Write A Graphic Novel? experiment.
• Second one is waiting for Just The Right Artist to come along.
• Fourth one seemed like a good idea at the time, but in truth it sucks. It can probably be fixed, but doing so isn't on my immediate or near-future radar. Eventually I'll get back to poking at it with a cudgel, but not anytime soon.
  
• Fifth one is currently being unleashed upon by The Mighty And Talented Bruno.
• (The 3/4ths one, which came between the first and the second, is entirely too long of a tale of woe to get into here (or anywhere for that matter). And that's all we'll say about that.)

But the third one? It makes me chuckle that the third one out of the word processor is the first one to actually get off of a drafting table. Last week artist Mia Wolff sent a CD holding the entire completed 100-page shebang. Because all tech hates me, it took me this long to get the files to open up so I could go ooooo at the pages.  The spread below is one of my favorites from our book.

Yes, I'm biased. But damn this thing is pretty! Mia did a fabbo job.

*** The items labeled "Project A" and "Project B" that have been on the siderail for a while are not g/ns. Those are regular novels.   What's funny is the word count doesn't actually mean anything in the traditional sense...Long story, interesting only to Moi.

I Hope This Hasn't Been Thrown Behind The Firewall By The Time It Posts

If you have a passport, now is the time to renew it -- even if it's not set to expire anytime soon. If you don't have a passport and think you might need one, now is the time to get it.

>snip<

The shielding does no good when the passport is open. Travel abroad and you'll notice how often you have to show your passport: at hotels, banks, Internet cafes. Anyone intent on harvesting passport data could set up a reader at one of those places. And although the State Department insists that the chip can be read only by a reader that is inches away, the chips have been read from many feet away.

The other security mechanisms are also vulnerable, and several security researchers have already discovered flaws. One found that he could identify individual chips via unique characteristics of the radio transmissions. Another successfully cloned a chip. The State Department called this a "meaningless stunt," pointing out that the researcher could not read or change the data. But the researcher spent only two weeks trying; the security of your passport has to be strong enough to last 10 years.

This is perhaps the greatest risk. The security mechanisms on your passport chip have to last the lifetime of your passport. It is as ridiculous to think that passport security will remain secure for that long as it would be to think that you won't see another security update for Microsoft Windows in that time.

Clicky to read the entire thing.

I Think The Word You're Looking For Is STEEL

Some of you will know what this particular model of sewing machine means as far as the Annals Of Sewing Machines  are concerned:

For those who don't, short version = AWESOME. This was my Mom's machine. (Not the particular one in the picture, mind you.)

Recently I joined a sewing circle that runs old-school style, a bunch of women gathered together to stitch, chat and eat, where the experienced seamstresses mentor those of us with only a bit of a clue. It's *very* hands on - if you don't do the work, they kick your ass out - and it's a lot of fun.  When I told  Mom about it, she was very pleased and shared stuff I did not know about sewing circles and women in our family going back a couple of generations. Mom let it be known that if I didn't learn how to draft my own patterns and how to make a buttonhole without pushing a button, she would not necessarily tell me DIRECTLY of her disappointment, but she would all sorts of ways to IMPLY dissappointment. For the rest of my natural life. (Mom has a few nicknames within the family. "Columbo" is one of them. "The General" is another.)

After our chat, and without advance warning, Mom sent the sweetest dispatch to BGF Central written on sewing-themed stationary she'd created with clip art.  I called her all weepy, and after mocking me for  what she claims is my increasing sentimentality,  we got to talking about the machine above. The following conversation took place a couple of days after her note arrived and moments after Victory was achieved.

BGF: I'm going to name her either Babs or Freddie in your honor! I'm leaning toward Babs.
BGF's Mom: I don't like Babs.
BGF:  Babs is a great name. It's also a traditional nickname for yours.
BGF's Mom: (Name omitted) called me that once, and I told her I didn't like it at all.
BGF:  ... Freddie it is, then!
BGF's Mom:  I spell it without the 'e' at the end. Just the 'i'.
BGF: Ooookay. I can work that.
BGF's Mom: I also use one 'd'.
BGF: I am incapable of spelling Freddi with only one 'd', Ma.
BGF's Mom: I'm telling you how I spell it.
BGF:  I mean, it looks weird enough without the second 'e'.
BGF's Mom: Since you're naming it after me, I thought you would want to know how I spell it.
BGF: Yes, but --
BGF's Mom: If you don't care about how I spell it, that's fine.
BGF: ... Fredi it is!

(For those keeping score, Mom: 9,326,543, BGF: 0. And you know, there are many times I thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster for that.)

I can't wait until she finds out I'm gonna paint 50s-style trucker flames all over it!

She Is Her Own Twin

"In her blood, she was one person, but in other tissues, she had evidence of being a fusion of two individuals," Uhl said.

It's a rare condition called chimerism, with only 30 documented cases worldwide. In Greek mythology, "chimera" means a monster: part goat, part lion, part snake.

In human biology, a chimera is an organism with at least two genetically distinct types of cells — or, in other words, someone meant to be a twin. But while in the mother's womb, two fertilized eggs fuse, becoming one fetus that carries two distinct genetic codes — two separate strands of DNA.


The twin is invisible, but for chimeras the twin lives microscopically inside the body as DNA.

When Uhl told Keegan she was her own twin, Keegan said she was shocked. "You wouldn't imagine that that could even be possible."